Criticism

The mattresspolice.com site is a snarky, quite funny site. The link is an old post, but whenever I read stories like that it just makes me shake my head. Too often my fellow building inspection professionals forget that our job is to provide a service to the public. We are supposed to be making sure that any construction meets the minimum code requirements, not make life difficult for our customers.

Trying to get away with something

Well, it happened again. Some guy was arguing with one of our counter technicians about whether or not we required plumbing drawings for a residential permit. The answer is yes. It has been yes for a very long time. Now, the building code doesn't require plumbing plans fore residential projects, so many don't. They assume the inspectors will take care of it out in the field. We have great inspectors, but they have enough work to do without having to size pipes in their heads while inspecting a house. Plus, we like to see that the people who design the plans put some thought into all aspects of the construction. It makes the job easier for the plumber and everyone else on down the line.

But that's not the point. The point is that he was arguing with our wonderful counter staff about it. "I didn't have to do that for my last project." Bull. If your plans went through this office, it had to have plumbing plans. If not, we really messed up. It is good that the techs catch things like that, because it can actually make your plancheck go faster. We won't approve your plans until we have all the information we need. Better to catch it now than after we finally get to your plans, write a correction letter, then get to your revisions some time in the next two weeks or so.

Frustrated, she came back to our office to ask for some help dealing with the guy. Inspectorguy volunteered to go. As soon as he rounded the corner into view of the counter, the customer said, "I guess I'll go get some plumbing plans." I heard him and couldn't help but break out in laughter.

What is it with some guys that they just can't deal with women?

Screaming Will Get You Nowhere

Wow, I can't believe I haven't written in a month. There really hasn't been much going on with the whole housing slowdown. We have had to make drastic budget cuts which, thankfully, do not include personnel reduction. We're just stuck with our ancient computers for another year. I can live with that.

This week we had quite the winner. Normally I don't really notice the customers unless somebody requests for me to come out to the counter. That may have something to do with why my story fodder is lacking. I was at my desk when suddenly, from the other side of the office, I heard a guy yelling at the counter staff about how unfair it is that he has to get a permit and "Big Brother" is trying to control everything. I'm still not sure what a reality-TV show has to do with anything.(:-p) Then I heard something very interesting - I worked for [this governmental entity] for 40 years and never had to do this before!! I couldn't help but laugh. Usually it's "I've been a Contractor for 30 years. . ." By the time I got out to see what was going on, the offender disappeared.

When he was out of the building, everyone broke out in shocked laughter. Apparently he was the head of one of the departments in my building and had retired just the year before. Here was a guy who ran a governmental agency yelling and screaming about the government trying to screw him. According to several people, this is not the first time he has railed against the very government for which he worked. The people he supervised hated him. He went so far as to ban anyone from talking about anything that wasn't work-related. How would you like to work for that guy?

This whole uproar was over a residential re-roof permit, which is probably one of the easiest and cheapest permits to get besides maybe a water-heater or electrical panel swap. The first issue was that he was caught doing the work without a permit and one of the inspectors gave him a Stop Work Order. So Mr. Anti-Government was already upset coming in. The yelling started after we had him get an OK from the Planning Department. That is standard procedure for every jurisdiction for which I have worked. I have never seen a re-roof denied by planning. Sometimes there are minimum material requirements such as using dimensional composition roofing instead of the cheap three-tab, which I recommend for durability anyway. The department he ran is tied closely to ours, so it's not like he didn't know how the process works. He's just bitter and angry about something.

At the end of the process, he threw the check at the counter staff, grabbed the paperwork after refusing to sign it, and stormed out. Wow. This isn't a big town, and people love to talk. I'm sure half the town knows about it by now. The strange thing is his wife is known as a very sweet woman. I don't know how she puts up with him.

I praised all involved here for keeping their cool and staying professional through all that. Especially the one who used to work for him. I aspire to never be like that guy.

Homeowners Beware!!

While I don't go out of my way to watch it, one of my favorite shows on TV is Holmes on Homes, shown on the HGTV network. The premise is that he goes around fixing the mistakes of lousy, lying, and often unlicensed contractors. Sometimes I wish I could crack those thieves posing as contractors over the head with something heavy.

We had a woman come in upset over a contractor who had required a large down payment for the work, started tearing things apart, then disappeared. First of all, you should never pay more than 10% of the job cost as a deposit. If they want more than that, they are often in financial trouble and that should be your first clue that something is about to go wrong. There are exceptions, of course, but it's a general rule of thumb.

Unfortunately, there's really not much we can do about it, but we do what we can. So, we looked up the license number the "contractor" gave the woman and it was for a man with a completely different name from a town 100 miles away. Our state's Contractors License Board listed the license as a "sole proprietorship," so we knew he wasn't an employee. Just to make sure, we called the owner of the license and he said he had met the thief a while back to discuss a possible business deal, but got the impression that the guy was a creep so he quickly declined. Instead, the slimeball just started using the legitimate guy's license number.

Man, that pisses me off. We notified the License Board and our local District Attorney. That's really all we can do. Unfortunately, that woman will probably never get her money back.

Moral of the story? Background checks are very easy to do in the Information Age. Before you hand over your hard-earned money, make sure you do your research first. Sometimes even that doesn't work, but it certainly can't hurt. There are many great contractors out there, and I hate that scum-sucking ******-******* ******* @#%(&*^ *$%&$#@%& out there ripping people off ruin it for the good guys (and gals) and make us have to go through such a process.

Be careful out there, and remember that your project probably needs a permit. If your contractor says you don't, give us a call, then fire him/her if they have lied to you.

Theological World View

I ran across an interesting quiz today through a link from http://snarkybastards.com/ . It seems to be quite accurate. Here are my results.

You scored as Evangelical Holiness/Wesleyan, You are an evangelical in the Wesleyan tradition. You believe that God's grace enables you to choose to believe in him, even though you yourself are totally depraved. The gift of the Holy Spirit gives you assurance of your salvation, and he also enables you to live the life of obedience to which God has called us. You are influenced heavily by John Wesley and the Methodists. Evangelical Holiness/Wesleyan 93% Emergent/Postmodern 68% Fundamentalist 57% Neo orthodox 57% Classical Liberal 43% Modern Liberal 43% Reformed Evangelical 39% Charismatic/Pentecostal 39% Roman Catholic 32% What's your theological worldview? created with QuizFarm.com

Things are slowing down/Some day I'll own a house.

Everybody is impacted by the housing slowdown. Contractors are out of work, truck sales are slowing, people who bought investment properties last year owe more than their houses are worth now. . .

However, for some things that is good. If you are planning to build something right now, we are getting the plans turned around fairly quickly. At one point we were returning plans within three weeks, which isn't too bad when you consider that several governement agencies other than us look at your project.

My wife and I are excited because if prices keep going the way they are, we might actually be able to afford our first home in a couple years. Maybe. As an inspector it could be a bit difficult because I am going to be very picky about the condition of the house and will probably research it to death. I also have some particular requirements for the layout because I have too many hobbies and my wife is a fantastic cook. Let me dream a bit: it needs a nice, open layout for the kitchen; a living room that will allow for a home theatre layout; and either a big garage or enough property to build one.

Most important are the structural aspects of the house. First, I would never, ever buy a house with a 1-coat stucco exterior. I don't really care for stucco in the first place, but that stuff is terrible. For those who don't know, 1-coat stucco is a system used here in California (I don't know about other places) where a special high-density foam board with wire attached is nailed to the exterior. Then, one 3/8-inch layer of stucco is applied with a thin color topcoat after that. It is much better now than it was when introduced 20 years ago, but it's just too fragile for my taste. The neighbor kids were playing baseball in the street the other day and put a dent in the stucco of the rental house we are in now. I suppose it's better than a window. My favorite siding right now is any of the products by James Hardie Siding.

Speaking of windows, that is the other priority for me. I don't like wasting energy if I can help it, and windows are very good at doing just that. Old-style single-pane windows just don't work anymore, and can be expensive to replace. Most newer homes have double-pane vinyl windows at a minimum, which work well but lack character and style. They are more expensive, but I prefer wood windows with either vinyl or aluminum cladding on the exterior.

Well, that's enough for now. Sorry I don't have any interesting stories for this post. It has been slow, as I mentioned, and as a result many of our more interesting characters have been staying away.

Then why did you ask?

People are funny. As mentioned before by Inspector Guy, you probably need a permit for that project you have planned. If you are unsure, just give us a call - we'll be happy to answer your questions, mostly. I say mostly because it can be frustrating when homeowners who don't know a thing about construction ask, "I want to build a garage. Is this plan I drew on a napkin good enough?" Well, it's a start, but have you considered calling a professional? It is tough explaining things like braced walls and foundation design with someone over the phone. Sometimes it's just as difficult explaining it to someone in person.

This post came about from a woman who called asking if she needed a permit for one of those open-sided metal RV carports. Well, yes, technically you do. I need to see the plans from the manufacturer and the foundation design from you. It gets pretty windy here, so I want to make sure the thing won't blow away. Then starts the whining. What if I do this? What about that? But none of the neighbor kids got permits for their carports. That's nice. You asked - I answered. We haven't heard from here since, so I'm assuming it has already been installed.

My jurisdiction isn't very picky about those open metal carports, and we don't have time to go around looking to bust people for them. However, not having a permit increases your liability if anything were to happen. If it flies away in a wind storm and damages something, your insurance probably won't cover it. If it violates a zoning or planning code, the code enforcement people go after those more often than we do. And any time a neighbor calls in to complain, we are obligated to investigate it.

The high cost of being cheap

No, it is not the goal of the Building Department to screw you and take all your money. At least not ours. Some of our local politicians would like to sponge off us, but that's a story for another time.

The reason I bring this up is because we had an older couple and their son come in and lie to us. The couple sat down, and the son stood at the counter. He had a piece of paper with a hand-drawn floor plan of the house (in pencil - sorry, I don't sign anything done in pencil because it's too easy to change afterward) with the locations and sizes of the windows. There is nothing wrong with hand-drawn plans when all you want to do is replace some of the windows and make a few of them larger than they were before. I looked over the drawing and said, "Sure, no problem."

Well, there was a problem. As Cindy started the permit process, she noticed that the house had been condemned ten years ago! The proverbial can of worms was now wide open and spilling everywhere.

"I'm sorry, this house was condemned. The letter from the Health Department says you have two options - completely fix it up, or tear it down."

"That's what we are trying to do."

"I understand, but it sounds like this place needs much more than just new windows."

"Well, we did put a new roof on it when it was originally tagged."

So we looked it up. Sure enough, there was one permit from ten years ago that was for "general repairs." There was one inspection (re-roofs generally require at least two) which was marked as "failed" with a note from the inspector explaining that the house had been red-tagged before the permit was issued and needed much more than just a roof. They have been lying by ommision about this project for ten years, it seems. Six months later, the permit expired without any further action.

Then I wanted to know what was really going on. Since they hadn't been up front with us, we went into the back room to call the Health inspector and get his side of the story. We told him that the couple was in to get new windows and he said, "No way. Absolutely not. There is much more wrong with that house than they are telling you. I was out there to follow up because of another complaint, and I tagged it again last week." Being fairly new here, I asked Cindy what the normal procedure is for red-tagged houses. She explained that we require a Special Inspection, where our head inspector goes out to the property and creates a list detailing exactly what needs to be done to bring the house up to current safety standards. Then, the owner has to do all of those things in order to occupy it again.

As we are talking about this, Juanita, our resident Spanish-speaker, came over and whispered, "Did you hear what they are saying?" "No." "They're talking in Spanish, saying you are back here trying to think up ways to charge them more money." "Wow, that's the most ridiculous thing I've heard in a while. That hurts."

Returning to the counter, I explained to them the procedure for dealing with the house. They either needed to schedule the special inspection, or get a permit to tear the house down. The reason for the Demolition Permit, as it is called, is to officially take the house off of the tax rolls so they don't have to pay taxes on a non-existent house. At this point, the mother started fuming, threating to call the County Supervisor in her district, and they are trying to fix up the place, and every other house in the area is just as bad as this one and this is going to cost so much. I held my tongue as I thought about how politicians don't frighten me one little bit, especially since they depend on people like me to vote for them, and that they have had TEN YEARS to save up for the repairs or just get rid of the place. When people get like this there is no talking to them, but I went on to explain that I would rather have them pay the $120 or so to have our inspector make sure the place was structurally sound and able to be repaired, than charge them whatever for a repair permit, and have the inspector tell them it can't be fixed after they have paid $1000+ for new windows. The inspector would make a list of all the repairs needed to bring the building up to Code, so everyone involved would know exactly what to expect. But no, we were just trying to rip them off.

Both the father and son got quiet, hung their heads a bit and started looking nervous. I gathered that this was not an unusual occurance. Apparently, they own several businesses in the area, and the house is on one of the many large parcels they own, so it's not like they are broke. If they don't do something about the building, the County can come in and demolish it if it's declared a safety hazard, and send them a bill for much more than it would cost for the owners to do it themselves.

Personally, I would just tear the place down. When houses sit for years like that with missing windows and broken doors, they start rotting from the inside out. Routine maintenance gets neglected, and small things that can be fixed easily if caught suddenly become huge problems. I'm sorry, but a ten-year-old non-inspected tin roof, new windows, and a fresh coat of paint just will not be enough to make this house a home again.

The nerve of some people. . .

I can't believe this. I love dogs, but this is just ridiculous. We just had a customer come in with his scrawny little mutt - with no leash - and just put the thing up on the counter as he picked up his permit. Our techs were in shock - they didn't know what to do as no one had ever been so inconsiderate before. So, they just let it happen and disinfected the counter afterwards. I was in shock too. I went out to ask the guy to leave his dog outside, but all I could do was stand and stare at him. Is this some kind of new trend, even in cowboy country? This is a place of business, not a dog park. What is this world coming to?

Don't get me wrong, as I said before I love dogs. Growing up I was always surrounded by an overabundance of furry, four-legged friends because my mother made a living grooming, breeding, and showing various breeds of dogs. Heck, I even spent half of my toddler years in a dog crate. (Don't go calling CPS - I'm too old and I'm exaggerating a little bit.) Now, my wife and I have an Australian Cattle Dog mix.

The point is, I would never ever even think about bringing my dog into a business (even if it is a governement building), much less put the thing up on the service counter. *Sigh* Of course, without him, I probably wouldn't have had anything to write about for today.

Another reason we take so long

If anyone is reading at this point, you may notice a change. Architect Critic found out about Inspector Guy's blog and said, "Hey, I was thinking about starting one." So Inspector Guy said, "I haven't been posting anything, why don't I add you to the blog."

So here I am.

This job can be a bit frustrating sometimes. I get people calling all the time asking how their plans are coming along and can they have their permit yet. Well, I'm getting to it. There is a line, and I can only do so much. Of course I could probably do more if I wasn't distracted so much - including the computer. But the reason I don't put all my effort into getting the plans done quickly is because even when I call the customer with the good news, more often than not the permit ends up sitting here for days - if not longer.

We have had one of those HUGE house plans, larger than 5000 square feet, sitting here for at least a month now. They expire 180 days after I approve them. The worst part is that we really need the fees from that house, as things are slowing down and our budget is shrinking. That large boost would help.

The moral of the story is, if you are going to call your building department every day asking if your plans are ready, PICK THEM UP AS SOON AS THEY ARE DONE! If more people did that (not that I am encouraging the calling every day part) we may be more inclined to turn the plans around more quickly.

Having said that, we aren't slacking off that much. Right now we are turning new projects around in about 3 weeks, which is pretty good compared to some of the other places I have worked or to which I have submitted plans.